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   Have you ever been surprised by someone's sudden spontaneity?  What about when that someone is God?  It always amazes me how He can see exactly what I need on several levels, simultaneously without me ever having a clue I had these needs.

 

   I felt poorly prepared for Sunday School this morning.  I couldn't remember things, I was unfocused.  I only had two girls show up, and they are sisters.  We played the game I planned, did our lesson ("Walking with God through Grief" [part II of 4]).  I then ran to the sound room, turned up the background music, prepped the CD recorder, double checked the video presentation system,  noted my helper wasn't coming.  I bounced around the sound room through out worship, able to settle to the computer once the sermon started.  After service, the CD duplicator couldn't read the 'master' CD, because the type of disk available, so I was unable to copy the disk for people, and got to listen to the grumbling.  Oh, poor me!

   After church, I saw this small young lady I didn't recognize sitting on the wall by the walkway, all by herself.  I thought I had seen her in church, but barely noticed her inside.  To be honestly, I barely noticed her there, either.

   My niece grabbed my hand and told me she needed me to follow her so she could give my DVD back to me (I didn't remember lending it!)  Turns out, the DVD was in her bag. Outside. Sitting by the wall.  And, you guessed it, right beside that lady.  I said hello, and she said hi.  My niece (9) leaped into my arms; my sister seeing this came over to rescue me.  She greeted the lady, and took my niece back to their car.

 

   I asked the lady if she needed a soda, or bottled water.  She looked at me kind of questioning, so I told her i was the youth leader, and had access to such things.  When she heard me say that, she felt I might be someone she could talk to, and her story came forth.

   Her name is Jessica, and she had recently 'come' from Set Free Ministries (a recovery mission outreach, which ministers to homeless and addicts in a 1 year recovery program).  She said she had been there for 3 weeks (so I don't think she graduated), was clean and sober and battling with CPS (Child Protective Services) to get her kids back.  She was on the edge of tears from the start.

She was scared. She felt alone.  She felt unloved, and powerless. 

    She wanted to go up to the pastor at the invocation, but felt embarrassed to go in front of a group she doesn't know.  (The pastor was a fill-in pastor for while our interim pastor is on duty (A.F. Res.), so he hadn't hung around after church.)  She was waiting for her ride to take her to an area to sell newspaper subscriptions.  God put her on that wall.

   Her back story included Catholic Dad, Paganistic Buddhist Mom (Tarot Reader). Muslim 'abusive' husband. Someone (thanks God!) told me she was still denying personal responsibility, but that wasn't what she needed to deal with today.

 

   She was not looking for money.  She was not seeking a 'boyfriend' relationship.  She wanted to know if her questions were OK.  She felt angry, didn't know where to point that anger, so she pointed it at God.  God was there to answer her.  It wasn't my words that came out, it was His.

 

   He told her He KNEW what it was like to lose your child, because we had killed His.  He told her he knew what it was to long for your kids, and to fight to get them back, because He does that for us (His children) every hour of each day.  He told her where to find power: in Him.  He told her where to find comfort: in His Word. 

 

   God also talked to me, at the same time.  He said "I'm in this young lady.  I didn't ask you to simply read a lesson from a publisher!  My message would be just as effective if the pastor shouted from behind a tree-stump as through a microphone! I want you to SEE EVERYONE!  I am THERE!  They NEED Me, and I've chosen people to go to them through people. Like YOU.  I just need you to be awake and looking for where I am active.  I will do the work, you just need to be willing!"

   I tell you what, there was no way I was feeling "Poor me" after that. 

 

 PLEASE pray for Jessica, and her whole family.  God still has a lot to do there.

 

Please pray for me, because, apparently, God still has a lot of work to do HERE on me.

God bless you.

Tags: Middle JD Audio Video Service

I've been preparing next Sundays Sunday School lesson since Monday, and the next four weeks deal with "Walking through the maze of Grief" (by LifeWay publications)  So of coarse this molds my thought process during the week.  I felt compelled to share a bit of my thoughts on this, because it's something we all must face. 

The key word here is grief.  Everyone has experienced some amount of grief, from sadness over a lost beloved toy, a friend who moved (or you moved from), a pet who ran away or died, all the way to a family member passing away.  So, the question shifts to what can words do for me when I'm experiencing grief.

Notice I don't say IF, I say WHEN.  We live in a fallen world.  We WILL experience grief.  The Bible even tells us this!

John 16:33(partial)  In the world ye shall have tribulation (KJV)

The sociology books tell you about the 5 stages.  They explain what they are quite clearly, but all of them seem to lack any help toward peace.  Those words are as close to comfort as the atheist will get.  I found no peace in them.

So what words can help you when the grief is all you know?  I have felt that grief, when all other emotions just seem like a joke, and your heart feels hollow.  Well, what about the same verse that told us we will have trouble!

John 16:33 These things I have spoken unto you, that in me ye might have peace. In the world ye shall have tribulation: but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world. (KJV)

It doesn't try to tell you your grief is WRONG.  It doesn't presume to give you a specific reason for what caused your grief (beyond a fallen world).  But it does tell you that God is with you, and is still in control.  God knows what grief is... remember the sky went BLACK and the whole earth shook when His only Son died right in front of Him.  And He was still God even then!  And He wants you to talk to Him.

There is another famous example of grief in John, which results in the heart wrenching shortest verse in the Bible.  In the story of Lazarus.  Jesus was, apparently, good friends with Martha, Mary, and their brother Lazarus.  Lazarus gets sick, they send word to Jesus.  He tells His disciples they will see God's glory in this. Lazarus dies, THEN Jesus goes to see them. by the time He gets there, Lazarus has been dead FOUR DAYS.

Now here's an important part to catch!  Martha runs out to meet Jesus, while her sister Mary stayed at home.  When Martha sees Jesus she says, "Lord, if you had been here my brother would still be alive." which is very close to "Lord, you could have stopped this from happening, why didn't you?"  Jesus didn't rebuke her.  He knew there was a plan, and that she was not aware of it.  He told her the plan, and asked her to get her sister.

Mary runs to Jesus, weeping, and falls at His feet, and says basically the SAME as Martha.  It seems she, and those who came with her were crying hard, Jesus didn't even try to talk to her.  She wasn't ready for words, and He knew it.  It says that Jesus was emotionally moved.  Then the famous verse, "Jesus wept." (Jn 11:35)  Did He weep for Lazarus? No. Why? Because He knew what was to come! He wept for Mary, His heart went out to her in her suffering, and He shared it with her. This shows how human Jesus was.

These stories tell us, it's OK to cry. It's OK to ask God questions, even hard ones.  It's OK to be human in God's presence. Keep in mind, though, that God does have a plan, and this too is inside His plan.  The world may seem to spin, but God is still in control.

Jesus, of coarse, showed them the plan by raising Lazarus from the dead. This showed us that Jesus was God. (It also has one of the funniest Biblical verses: "Lord, by this time he stinketh" (Jn 11:39 partial))
God may not show you what His plan is at the time you are grieving.  You may not figure it out at all, because His ways are not ours.  But rest assured everything, in the BIG picture (the one in God's mind), has a reason.

I know this may not be the big, comprehensive end-all to grief.  There are a lot of issues that come up.  Some people may have chemical imbalances which require medication during times of grief, while others may internalize the grief to the point of self hatred.  If you find yourself at that dark point, PLEASE call 1-800-273-TALK (8255)   

If you just want someone to talk to, you can message me, and I will be willing to talk to you, and pray with you. You could text me at 858-215-4 Him. (Not a voice line, only accepts text.)

Tags: Middle JD Issues Grief

A long time ago... (grade school)

In a galaxy far, far away... (actually a block from where I sit.)

 

I used to invite my buddy, Tom, to Sunday School, and VBS, but RARELY would he come near church.  He was always an awesome artist, his art work looked as if copied from a high quality comic. (But they wouldn't include that much gore.)  And he always had a huge heart.

 

When I left High School, I lost touch with him, (and almost all my friends) when I joined the USMC.  Now, Tom is a Christian, and has started a web page!  Praise God!

 

I want to share a portion from his "Music" section:

 

Two days before I left Panama, we were all in the van driving to work. I was listening to my mp3 player, as I usually did. It was great because we would inevitably get stuck at the canal for almost an hour, and also because it drowned out my annoying coworkers–and believe me, they would annoy Mother Theresa. And like usually happens, God knew better than me what I needed. After the first week, it became part of my devotional time–I would just put on my worship playlist and go.

On this particular morning, the first song that came on when we stopped at the canal was this TobyMac song called “The Slam,” which is one I usually skip over. Never really thought much about listening to it–I didn’t care for his intro. This time, I stopped and listened to the words and this particular verse about John the Baptizer kept repeating in my head.

They came from the cities and towns all around
To see the longhaired preacher from the desert get down
Waist high in water, never short on words, he said
Repent, the kingdom of heaven can be yours
But he stopped in the middle of his words and dropped
Down to his knees and said, behold the Lamb of God
He’s the one, the slam, don’t you people understand?
You’re staring at the son, God’s reaching out his hand

John the Baptist was really an amazing person. To start with, he fearlessly proclaimed the word of God, regardless of potential consequence. And he also foretold of the coming messiah,¨the thongs of whose sandals he was not worthy to untie.

And what I was thinking about was that not only did John recognize that a messiah was coming and the kingdom of Heaven was near, he recognized Jesus when He came. Not everyone did. Think about it. When Jesus came to the Jordan to be baptized by John, he probably had to walk through a crowd of people that had come to hear John. And there were Pharisees among them. But Jesus ventured through the throng, and was baptized by an obedient John.

Behold the Lamb of God.

I wonder, how many of us would recognize Jesus if He came in such a way today? Think about it, just for a minute. What if you were at church? What if your pastor was right in the middle of a sermon, and then dropped to his knees in the pulpit when some scruffy looking guy in jeans and a work shirt came in?

Would you recognize him, too? Or, to steal from Brennan Manning, would you think your pastor’s cheese was sliding off his cracker?

I wonder what I would do? I like to think I have enough discernment that I’d be able to recognize

the lamb of God, who takes away the sin of the world

 

I like the way he put this.  If you're not familiar with the song, you can check it out here:

 

God bless!

Tags: Middle JD Audio Video

Sitting around, writing this at almost 7pm on New Years Eve.  I sit with my immediate family, which is me, myself, and I.  (Can I ride in the carpool lane now?)  The normal men's group meeting on Saturday mornings has been postponed until the Saturday after New Years, yet it still weighs heavy on my heart.

 

It is a small group, of around 8-10 guys, originally formed as a book club.  That is one of those titles that means less than it implies.  Most book clubs would read a common book at home, then discuss it when they convene.  This club is lucky if portions are read as directed by the leader.  (Most of our men are not big into reading.)

 

At one point, around one Saturday a month, we would do a community service project.  THAT was a big hit with the men, but repetitive planning and logistics wasn't easy, so these outings gradually decreased.  To top it, the group had been led by our Pastor, who has now gone to another flock.  He appointed a very good leader to take his place. 

 

The problem is, that person's leadership is being used us the Sunday School Teacher for the "Married with Kids" class (He is also married, with 3 kids.)  This means his focus MUST stay on his Sunday School class,  while the men's group has become more or less a recycled men's Sunday school class with guided discussions.  I'm not saying that is a 'bad format', but, for our men, it doesn't seem to be encouraging them to be Biblical Spiritual Leaders.

 

I have tried to encourage the current leader, loaning him some of the books I've bought, even buying study outlines, but he has said he just doesn't have the time these would require, and I do respect that he is telling the truth.  I would not try to take over, because this would be seen as a 'power play' for leadership positions.  Our church really does not need any additional ruffled feathers, while we search for a new pastor.

 

Two quick asides, the leader I speak of is also the head of the Pastor Search Committee.  And we now have an interim Pastor!

 

I just purchased the teaching series from Liquid, called "The Ten: 1-5".  (Please use one of the advertised links on MCH to a Christian Outlet to purchase it, if you are interested.)  I noticed the segments were portions of the movie "I Am".  (I turned off inbound TV signals over 2 years ago, so I buy a lot of Christian media!)  I plan on buying the second section "6-10" soon.  I have the idea of showing the movie, as one Saturday meeting, then going through the ten week video guided discussion on the Ten Commandments, and how they are still very applicable.

 

I need to set this up as a benefit to the teacher, NOT me usurping his position.  It's going to take a lot of preparatory work on my part, so that he can present this without needing to prepare.  Please pray for me in this.  I will need to generate reproduce-able student outlines, and simple teacher talk points.  (Liquid DOES include a guide, but it is leader and participant guide in one! And still requires extensive teacher prep.)

 

If this is what God wants, He will enable it.  I may teach Sunday School, and lead Youth Group, but I am not running a business, with 3 kids, and a search committee!  (And I know how tough his kids are, I've taught each of them in one class or another!)

 

I know that our Youth Group is going to be the one's leading our church in the future, but doesn't that mean our adults should be leading our church today?  We do have around 8 people who have stepped up, and are literally running the church.  I see these strong men each Saturday, and it hurts me to know the things our Church could be, if we just allowed God to use us.

 

I guess it's time to push from the middle again. So, hitch up your breeches, rub your hands together, and find somewhere to push from where YOU are!

 

"There's a war going on out there, if you're not willing to shoot, why not carry the bullet? Even the worst of you could serve as bad examples..."

            &nb sp;                          - Dr. Kent Hovind

 

 

God bless!

Tags: JD Middle Man Ministry

As formerly mentioned in a previous blog, lessons (on Wed) have been on relationships.  (Of course the last one was of a more Christmas-y flavor.)  The classes aren't as hard as I had at first thought.  I do a TON of research, reading, praying, planning, and more praying.

 

There has been a bit of an odd couple of circumstances. I do a lot of eating out.  (Hello- single guy, not dating... dishes? No way!)  And these times are perfect for reading.  Of late, I have been reading Christian books on dating.  My waitress noticed the title of the book I was reading, and asked about it.  I explained why I was reading it, told her about the youth group, and all.   She took my order and went on her way.

 

After I had been served my meal, and was winding it down, my waitress came back with another waitress, and asked if they could talk with me.  I told them that would be fine, and they both sat down across from me.  Seems they were both in the dating scene, and didn't feel like they were very good at it.  (Amazing how much conversation you can put into a prayer said under your breath!)

 

God was definitely at that table.  I told them the Biblical perspective on the dating game.  I told them what standards they should uphold.  That led to who set the standards.  And that led to talking about a Holy God who loved them so much He would die for them.

 

I won't lie and say they dropped to their knees and are ready for baptism (though I wouldn't have minded!)  They have told me (on other nights) that they have applied the principals I laid out, and were having a much better dating experience. (Special thanks to Jeanne Mayo, and her book "The Uncensored Truth About Friendship, Dating, & Sex")  With any luck, I might get two new college kids into church. Not holding my breath, but not putting anything past God, either!

 

It is also refreshing that when I broach any topic resembling intimacy, the entire junior high group blushes in unison.  I was afraid that the kids had a more sophisticated dating mentality than me from the 4th grade on! (After all, my last "date" pre-dated the 21st century)  It is nice to know that, despite being in public school, it hadn't quite (yet) degraded to pubic school. 

 

Well, it's almost time  for Men's group, then I need to print the CD's for the audio distribution of worship service.  And I need to finish preparing the activity for youth Sunday School (decorating a 2lb Rice Krispy Treat). And I need  to set up a Trustees meeting to discuss our last water bill.  So much for a day off, I guess.

 

God bless!

Tags: Middle Man JD

Amazing how all the issues with the multimedia computer, sound board, 4 amplifiers, Digital Mastering center, and auto-mixing electronics kind of hit the back burner when  you minister to actual people.

 

I was co-leader in youth group, and substitute for Sunday School.  Now, I am not only primary, but unassisted leader.  I prepare two lessons a week, two projects or games a week.  I need to be prepared with issues ranging from cheer leading, to goth.

 

Oddly, there are only 3 boys in the entire group, and, at best, only one may show up at a time (more commonly, I have an all girl class.)  {If I were a teen-aged boy, I'd be in that group so fast, the air pressure would cause a vacuum.}  So it looks like I will need to add personal local mission trips to my agenda.

 

This can get a little daunting while working a full time job.  Not to mention I live alone, so I don't have any good places to bounce ideas.  It might be easier if my church was large enough to place greater resources in to the youth.  But we are working on getting a new pastor, first.  (Not foremost, because missions remains foremost.)

 

One issue I need to tackle, is that my Wednesday night group is FAR larger than my Sunday School group.  Granted, a couple of them go to a different nearby church, which doesn't provide Wednesday service, but I really would like to get these guys plugged into the church!  They can't grow spiritually in a vacuum, and the church will not progress.

 

(Imagine if the younger crowd had never matured INTO the church.  We wouldn't HAVE multimedia in church now.)

 

We had designed a progression of lessons for Wednesday nights, and if I keep that up, on Dec 1st I'm scheduled to do a lesson on "sexual temptation".  That may need to change.  I don't think I should tackle that issue in a group of girls, especially alone.

 

Please keep me in prayer.  I can't fail in this endeavor, the stakes are eternal, and God is on my side.  But the vision for the future, as usual, is quite muddy.  And pray that I can remain the Christian man at work.  (You don't see a lot of Christian morals displayed on construction sites.)

 

If you have ideas for youth workers, please contact me.  If you need support as a youth worker, please contact me as well.

 

God bless! 

Tags: Middle Man JD

I started, a couple years ago, working as a "Listener" for our church's Awana program.  (Consists of listening to kids recite verses, make sure they completed the section, sign  it off, and help them record it.)  Mostly with the 1st-5th graders, but occasionally in the youth room.

 

This year I started as a leader in the Awana Youth (I am subordinate to the other leader). And in a strange twist, I became the 7th-12th (Youth) Sunday School teacher.

 

Our youth group, right now, is VERY small.  (This may be God's way of making sure I don't get scared away.)  I have a building passion for enlarging this group, while at the same time wanting to make sure I keep it personal.

 

One issue that popped into my head is from a couple of weeks ago, when only 1 youth came to Sunday School.  Schedules and sickness had removed my few other students.  This was the first week I was the teacher, and had only recieved the job 15 minutes prior, so I was unprepared, and nervous. I only had the student book, my Bible, and the one student had already done the activities in the the student book due to, "boredom at last weeks sermon."

 

I muddled my way through, and we went on to church, but the issue didn't strike my mind until the next week.

 

The one student was female.

 

I never even THOUGHT about how bad that COULD'VE appeared to anyone!  An over 40 guy, alone in a room with a teenage girl for an hour.  It was appalling that it might even be an issue, but in the world we have today, it definately IS an issue.

 

I have since discussed this with our Interum Sunday School Superintendant (we do not currently have a Pastor), and we devised a strategy to avoid any future appearance of impropriety.

 

It's amazing the things you need to deal with.

 

Another issue is with someone else in the group.  They (I'm not identifying age, sex, name, NOTHING) are dealing with a mental illness.  The hardest part is that it occurs multiple times throughout this family.  (Most mental illnesses DO have genetic markers, and significant heretical liklihoods)  I have dealt with people going through depression before (maybe even clinical strength), but this is a diferent ballgame entirely!

 

This person is going through something I have not experienced, both illness, and familialy.  This person, during the lesson in Awana club ("Building Character"[Rom 5:3-5]), suddenly was VERY interested.

 

The lesson talked about (Romans5:3) Joy, Troubles, & Patience.

 

Then this person asked, "But what if sometimes we find it hard to believe God exists?"  The expression on this person's face showed that this was not an idle, fiddling question, but one that could be vital to life itself. 

 

My heart almost broke with the pain that eminated from that couch.  This person was trying to reason through something that philosophers have been debating for centuries with a conciousness that was sometimes unreliable.  And I knew that none of the words I knew could I put together to build the bridge this tortured soul needed back to a loving God.

 

This person was bealing with a bipolar life. (deep depression, with fits of mania (high spirits, accompanied by confusion, and perception of vitality. Possibly periods of psychosis. Plus the pschotropic drugs to try and deal with this.) This person also was dealing with an instutionalised family member, plus a percieved stigma from school peers.

 

So, this question, "Where is God?", is of vital importance.  It is for me as well.

 

I said that the world we live in is broken, it is not God who is doing this.  The world is broken, but God has given us hope.  Hope in His Son, Jesus.  And hope that He can bring us through.

 

The person seemed to think about this for a while.  We continued with the lesson, but shortly, it was apparent that person needed to get away from the group.  I stayed with the group, while the other leader accompanied.

 

I could only pray.  (Even that got to be tough, because now I was listening to verses by myself, so suddenly in great demand.)

 

I saw the person after Awana. (I am first there, and last to leave.) They seemed much happier, and without a word, walked up and gave me a hug.  I pray that means the Holy Spirit gave that person the message needed.

 

Since Wednesday, I have done moderately extensive reading on the subject of bipolar disease and Christianity.  It seems this question is pervasive in that sphere.  It seems in the Manic "Euphoric" state, the person feels SO good they don't feel a need for God, but in the deressive state they get so down they can't think.  The online Christian community doesn't seem all that helpful toward this either!

 

One of the major voices tries to say that bipolar disease is not REALLY a disease, but is just some depression (since there is no laboratory test (currently) to prove it exists.) and patients should stop taking the medicine!  That is so Biblically unsound, it's laughable.  The Bible supports treating sickness with medicine (1 Tim 5:23).  There are no laboratory tests which prove Heaven exists, yet we know that exists!

 

I would love to hear what others might say about these topics.  After all, I'm just this middle man, on a path that is not my own.

Tags: Middle JD Issues

You may have seen I've become active as a leader in the youth program at our church.  My church is pretty small (but I'm told it is the 'average' of a So. Baptist church in America.)

 

On a typical Sunday School we have about 5 in the youth group, on Wednesday, about 9.  Typically,  only 1 boy, the rest girls.  Oddly, there are 2 boys, but they never seem to come at the same time.

 

I enjoy the interactions, and worship.  It's fun to see the different ways they react, learn, and respond to the same input.  But being in youth ministry is much more than a couple hours on two days a week.  They are youth, with real life issues, 7 days a week. 

 

Of course, one of the ways to keep in touch is social networking sites, like this one.  (I try to get them to join MCH, but they are hard pressed to give up secular friends.)  One of the things about computer socialization, is the partial anonymity, and the faceless-ness in posts.  That is good, when you seek honest thought.  It is hard when your not sure how to respond!

 

I can usually find an answer, if I have the time.  But the emotional outbursts from youth need an instant answer, or a simple acknowledgment that your listening.  If you wait, they are already on to a different emotion.  But what about outbursts which may indicate a deeper issue?

 

I had one of the girls post this on facebook:

 

dear dad,
i dont like you ♥ . in fact i hate you. ♥ yeah hates a strrooonnnggg word but now i know i truly mean it.
you just love yelling dont you?:) , especially at me. cause im an ungrateful kid huh?
i dont care who reads this but i hope you read it dad :)
and yeah yeah yeah im grateful to have parents . YEAH.

 

 

I know she has a strange and difficult family life, living with her step-mom, and strained relationships all around.  She also has a strong personal presence, and seems to have a great need of attention.  But how do you come up with a "text message" speed reply to a "therapy session" size question?

 

 One of the things to remember, is, you are only getting half of HER story, and none of dad's.  This is only the anger side of her story, it is not her whole view of her dad.  She will probably hide her true feelings.

 

The other thing to remember is to not over 'spiritualise' the issue, because it is easy to come up with platitudes to gloss over problems.  It does not matter that the highly spiritual answer is correct, it still doesn't show compassion in a way a hurting person can see NOW. (Maybe they will recall it later, but not in the midst of pain.)  And, yes, the feelings these teenagers feel is real. (The reality behind the feelings may not be, but the feelings remain.)

 

Should she be reprimanded for being angry at dad?  No.  The anger is not the sin, it is what was done with the anger (public declaration).  I don't know anyone who was never angry with their parents.  (And it may not be my place to make correction, as I don't know the whole circumstance!)

 

This just shows me how much more prepared I must make myself.  That is one of the things I learned about being a middle man:  you must get ready, and be prepared.  You are not going to need to blaze a trail, usually, for God is already working there.  You just need to be prepared to JOIN God in the work He is already doing!

 

Hmm, maybe THAT'S why I felt compelled to buy those books on Christian counseling so many months ago?! 

 

God bless.

 

 

Tags: Middle Man JD

Sometimes we learn lessons the hard way.  I'm pretty good at that.  Not something I'm proud of, but I eventually learn.

 

I've financially supported several people in the past.  Most of them have been too young to support themselves.  I've helped their parents, paid for birthdays, and made Christmas a special time.  All of them, except the parents, have come to know Christ as Savior, and I celebrate that.

 

It sometimes hurts when they barely acknowledge I exist.  I know they are in scary places in their lives, so I can accept that.  It just doesn't help my little ego.

 

That is part of the problem of being in the middle.  Your ego doesn't get stroked.  It is good, because the glory goes to who it should, God.  But it is hard to stand alone to push.

 

I know I am not alone, but it can sure feel that way.

 

My cell phone completely died the other day, and I'm not yet in a place to replace it.  So, isolation feels even deeper of late.  It will be good to go to Church tomorrow, just to see people.  (Oddly enough, I spent the entire sermon hidden in a little sound booth).

 

The Youth Group is a big morale booster, and they give me plenty to pray about.  Too bad it's once a week, right now.

 

Not sure if anyone out there has felt the odd feeling of dining alone at a restraint.  I'm usually the only one alone. 

 

The odd thing is, that I don't really crave an intimate companion right now.  It's kind of strange.  I'm not out seeking a 'girlfriend'.

 

God is enough.  He loves me enough to allow me to hold my head up, despite the man I would be without Him. 

 

When they stare at me for dining alone, I stop and pray for them on the spot.  Maybe they need the prayer, and that is why God had them look over.

 

When my 'kids' ignore me, I pray that they could be that light in the darkness their parents live in.  My heart yearns for them to be saved, and don't want their kids to spend eternity apart from them.  Maybe God uses those moments of indifference to spur me on to do better for Him.

(P.S. The picture in my gallery of the girl walking on water is one of those kids.  That was her Cinderella party.)

 

I just wish I would understand God when He whispers!  I just seem too stubborn, so He ends up shouting.  Some kids just learn the hard way.

 

 

From Cry No More by KJ-52

See he thought he could get through and maintain control
But little did he know he couldn't make it on his own
But that was just the time when you came through to show
How much You loved him and You wanted him to know
That You would never leave and You would never go
And You taught him to forgive and gave peace to his soul
And now he truly lives cause You made him whole
From that day ever since he ain't never been alone
That's why he'd convinced he don't have to cry no more

Cry no more
You don't have to cry no more
Don't cry no more
You don't have to cry no more

 

God Bless.

 

Tags: Middle Man JD

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