I've been preparing next Sundays Sunday School lesson since Monday, and the next four weeks deal with "Walking through the maze of Grief" (by LifeWay publications)  So of coarse this molds my thought process during the week.  I felt compelled to share a bit of my thoughts on this, because it's something we all must face. 

The key word here is grief.  Everyone has experienced some amount of grief, from sadness over a lost beloved toy, a friend who moved (or you moved from), a pet who ran away or died, all the way to a family member passing away.  So, the question shifts to what can words do for me when I'm experiencing grief.

Notice I don't say IF, I say WHEN.  We live in a fallen world.  We WILL experience grief.  The Bible even tells us this!

John 16:33(partial)  In the world ye shall have tribulation (KJV)

The sociology books tell you about the 5 stages.  They explain what they are quite clearly, but all of them seem to lack any help toward peace.  Those words are as close to comfort as the atheist will get.  I found no peace in them.

So what words can help you when the grief is all you know?  I have felt that grief, when all other emotions just seem like a joke, and your heart feels hollow.  Well, what about the same verse that told us we will have trouble!

John 16:33 These things I have spoken unto you, that in me ye might have peace. In the world ye shall have tribulation: but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world. (KJV)

It doesn't try to tell you your grief is WRONG.  It doesn't presume to give you a specific reason for what caused your grief (beyond a fallen world).  But it does tell you that God is with you, and is still in control.  God knows what grief is... remember the sky went BLACK and the whole earth shook when His only Son died right in front of Him.  And He was still God even then!  And He wants you to talk to Him.

There is another famous example of grief in John, which results in the heart wrenching shortest verse in the Bible.  In the story of Lazarus.  Jesus was, apparently, good friends with Martha, Mary, and their brother Lazarus.  Lazarus gets sick, they send word to Jesus.  He tells His disciples they will see God's glory in this. Lazarus dies, THEN Jesus goes to see them. by the time He gets there, Lazarus has been dead FOUR DAYS.

Now here's an important part to catch!  Martha runs out to meet Jesus, while her sister Mary stayed at home.  When Martha sees Jesus she says, "Lord, if you had been here my brother would still be alive." which is very close to "Lord, you could have stopped this from happening, why didn't you?"  Jesus didn't rebuke her.  He knew there was a plan, and that she was not aware of it.  He told her the plan, and asked her to get her sister.

Mary runs to Jesus, weeping, and falls at His feet, and says basically the SAME as Martha.  It seems she, and those who came with her were crying hard, Jesus didn't even try to talk to her.  She wasn't ready for words, and He knew it.  It says that Jesus was emotionally moved.  Then the famous verse, "Jesus wept." (Jn 11:35)  Did He weep for Lazarus? No. Why? Because He knew what was to come! He wept for Mary, His heart went out to her in her suffering, and He shared it with her. This shows how human Jesus was.

These stories tell us, it's OK to cry. It's OK to ask God questions, even hard ones.  It's OK to be human in God's presence. Keep in mind, though, that God does have a plan, and this too is inside His plan.  The world may seem to spin, but God is still in control.

Jesus, of coarse, showed them the plan by raising Lazarus from the dead. This showed us that Jesus was God. (It also has one of the funniest Biblical verses: "Lord, by this time he stinketh" (Jn 11:39 partial))
God may not show you what His plan is at the time you are grieving.  You may not figure it out at all, because His ways are not ours.  But rest assured everything, in the BIG picture (the one in God's mind), has a reason.

I know this may not be the big, comprehensive end-all to grief.  There are a lot of issues that come up.  Some people may have chemical imbalances which require medication during times of grief, while others may internalize the grief to the point of self hatred.  If you find yourself at that dark point, PLEASE call 1-800-273-TALK (8255)   

If you just want someone to talk to, you can message me, and I will be willing to talk to you, and pray with you. You could text me at 858-215-4 Him. (Not a voice line, only accepts text.)

Tags: Middle JD Issues Grief

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